'WHAT'S FEEDING YOUR SOUL?"

I've been impressed with all the Facebook posts I've seen, regarding everyone's areas and degrees of
creativity during this unfortunate incarceration. You've been painting, reading, jogging, honing your musical skills, sewing, quilting, redecorating your homes and, in general, re-charging your lives for the better! But let's get real. I admire your talents and your abilities, but really.....what time do you actually get out of your PJs? Rhetorical question.

I have to say......my creativity has taken a nose dive and I have not been very enterprising about doing
anything about it. I'm trying. Truly, I am. After all, this is only mid-May and we have till when? FOREVER, to get it done!!!??? I am determined to make some headway in some area! I'll get back to
you on that.

One thing I'm afraid that many of us are doing is cooking and baking. It just seems like the nurturing
thing to do, right? In the beginning of this mess I actually enjoyed it. I was cooking dishes I hadn't taken the time to cook in ages. And I was baking ad-nauseum for the sweet tooth in the family! But at
this point, I'm having trouble making toast or putting creamer in my coffee. I hate the kitchen, don't know why I even wanted one and I'm considering having it sealed off from the rest of the house. If I didn't have to walk through it to get to the laundry room or the back porch...........

Oh, well.......

On a brighter note, has anyone else found themselves going through cook books? I certainly have.
As women (or cooks, to be non-specific in gender), most of us have too many cookbooks but still
clamor for more. It's akin to an illness in some cases. I don't reach that magnitude, but I do have a lot.
Some are by well known authors, some are old classics like the good ol' Better Homes & Gardens....
I actually still have the little handmade cookbooks put together by Jamey's nursery school. And then there are the notebooks we've all compiled, containing the recipes we've clipped from magazines, etc. Ever made any of those wonderful recipes? Yeah, I know, once in a great while. But we've got 'em if we need them.

These days some people don't even open a cookbook. They just consult google. Am I right? Did I
hit a nerve? Again, rhetorical.

But without a doubt, my favorite cookbooks are the local ones, the ones compiled by local churches,
women's sororities and clubs. They have the recipes we go to over and over again. The pages are
sometimes stained and they bear the names of those wonderful women who submitted the recipes.
Our mamas and grandmothers, sisters, aunts, neighbors, dear friends, living and gone.....
Remember that wonderful meatloaf recipe that Mary made? Or that great chocolate cake recipe
from Bernice? Those are the best and you all know it.

Sometimes the recipes are even named after the people we remember and loved. Velma's Cocoa Fudge, Aunt Millie's Barbecue Sauce, Aunt Jane's Oatmeal Cookies.......You know what I mean. When we submit these recipes to a book that's being compiled, we do so in the name of a loved one because it was THEIR RECIPE, and by doing so, they are forever immortalized. It's an act of love
and of remembrance. I think that's because our memories are all wrapped up in the kitchen,
watching our moms or grandmas cook their special recipes and serve them to us - as acts of love.
So many treasured memories in our lives seem to include the kitchen and the food, the people and
the experiences that are shared around the dinner table.

I fear that to a great extent those days may not be so prevalent now, particularly while we're all
separated, one from another.

My grandma was not what you would call a great cook. There, I've said it. She just wasn't. But
she had her specialties. There's never been an oatmeal cookie as good as hers. And she made
great rhubarb pie! And if you checked her ingredients, there was more love in her recipes than
in anyone else's I've ever known. According to my own mother, she was not a good cook when
she married daddy. But he taught her to cook and he taught her very well. The downside? In her
brief life, she didn't teach me. She would always say, "You go do 'this or that'. It's easier if I
do it myself." Therefore, I reached adulthood not knowing too much about cooking or baking.
I've worked at it. I still work at it. I do ok. But who cares? I now hate the kitchen!!!

I'll close now. Gotta' clean the kitchen. Because after all, tomorrow is another day!

I made it to two out of three porches this evening, while listening to the music of High South.
It was wonderful. Fed my Friday night soul. I hope you're all well and finding something to
feed your souls.

See you on the porch!

'WHAT'S HAPPENING TO OUR LANGUAGE?"

I guess it's clear....I'm watching too much TV. Not because it's good, or that there's anything really
worth watching. But still, I watch. If I watch anything that's been done in the last five years (which lets out old movies and Gunsmoke), I'm realizing that people don't talk the way they used to.
Am I right? I'm getting used to the bad grammar (if you know me, you know that's huge and I'm not really getting used to it!!!!!!!). But it's more than that.

I used to have trouble hearing the word "like" being used every other word in a sentence. Such as.....Like, I went to the mall and like, I saw this great outfit, and like, it fit perfectly and like
I just had to have it......That craziness still exists in conversations but LIKE I kind of weed it out when I can. Now, it's the word "so". Every answer to every question has to start with the word "so".
Even the top journalists do it. For instance, "When did you know you wanted to be a performer?"
"SO, I knew when I was five." Or "Why did you decide to open your own restaurant?" "SO, I
loved to cook as a kid.........." What's happening????????? Try that sentence without the word SO and ya' know what? It makes perfect sense without the word SOOOOOO!

OK, moving on.....when in our language did the letter "g" become the letter "G"? Examples:

Giving - GivinG
Walking - WalkinG
Talking - TalkinG
Singing - SinginG

As I recall, that last letter, the letter "g", should be silent, soft....not hard and emphasized. Linda Cash Egge, talk to me!!! Have I completely lost my mind? When and why did this metamorphosis take place in our language? And honestly, I'm not sure why it bothers me so much. I mean, as lonG as
I believe I'm sayinG these words correctly or not endinG every sentence with hard G, shouldn't I be
satisfied? Maybe I'm not drinkinG enough! No, that can't be it!!!

Now, I'm telling you, I'm not even going to harp here about I seen it (saw it). Or I done it (did it). Or I should have went (gone). Or them guys (those)!!!!

I'm sorry. I apologize. I  know I'm getting mean and rude and overly judgmental and way too touchy
and .... did I mention rude? I don't mean to be. I realize that often when people say these things, they
are much brighter than I am..... more talented in lots of ways......And still I harp and harp and
harp! I can't blame it on the social distancing and the isolation, because people who know me know
I've ALWAYS been this way. Though I MAY be a little worse right now!!!!! And also, I know I can
make errors in grammar. I have a good friend who, in recent years, pointed out a couple of word usages that I often tended to mis-use. For instance, there's a big difference between fewer and less. And we so often mis-use the word anxious. Check it out! I was so thrilled to have it brought to my
attention and realized that, though I knew the difference, I had gotten lazy about the usage.

Oh, well, now that I've offended every reader I may have had, I'll sign off. I told myself I would
never write this blog for that very reason. And yet, here it is......

Bottom line, I guess it's not how we speak that should matter, as much as what we mean when we
say it. I guess it's not how we say it, as much as what's in our hearts as we speak. I may need to
be reminded of that from time to time. Forgive me, please.

Soooooo, I spent some time on the front porch this evening. It was a wonderful respite from TV and cleaning, etc. It looks like the coming week could offer some temps that are a little more inviting. Stay home. Stay safe and healthy and cautious and patient and well, you know........all those things
that are going to help us get through this.

"GRATEFUL FOR SMALL JOYS, AMID THE MADNESS"

To say it's been a while would  be delusional. And I don't doubt for a moment that to some extent
I am, during this period of isolation. Every day seems much the same as the one previous and the
one to come. Small things set each day apart, such as the weather and television shows perhaps (yuck). If I look at my calendar, I see events that had been planned, now crossed out with nothing in their place. Sounds depressing, tho' I don't mean it to. In some ways there's a certain comfort to the day-to-day routine, a routine I don't ever remember experiencing. We don't set an alarm. We rise in the morning when we wish, "lollygagging" till midday when each of us creates some small chore or activity to keep us occupied. And somehow evening comes 'round and it's time for dinner. I cannot
deny that I'm tired of cooking! I thought I liked to cook. I must reassess that idea.

When evening does approach, as you may guess, I sit on a porch for a at least a  little while. Some
evenings it's been a little cool for a long porch sit - even for me! But I bundle or cover and make the
effort anyway, often with a tiny little triple martini to mark the hour. Somehow a porch sit seems
necessary to round out the day, to watch the scant traffic go by, to feel the breezes, to watch how the
trees are budding. Just to feel a part of the world. Often times I will wander from porch to porch, just
to get a complete view. As much as I enjoy it - and I do.....as much as I am capable of enjoying my own company, and I usually do........I find myself looking at the empty rockers and longing for the company of the world. Then I'm reminded of how I felt during the ordinary days, before our unfortunate incarceration. I remember how grateful I would be for those quiet, alone moments on the
porch in the evenings, following busy days, bustling days, stressful days, when being alone seemed
like a gift. Perspective, right?

If and when we ever get to return to the normalcy we knew - and somehow that seems beyond
possible, will I remember how it felt to long for the company of the world? Or will I quickly forget
and return to longing for alone time? I guess time will tell.

For now, I know I have much for which to be grateful. I am not living in this big brick tomb by myself. There's room to spread out, but also the room to come together and Robert and I are doing both. We are retired, so we don't have to worry about going to work and endangering ourselves or each other. So far we're safe and undiagnosed with the dreaded "rona". And we have the ability
to stay in touch with loved ones via phone and social media. All in all, not the worst situation at all.

So, we are going from day to day, taking pleasure and joy in small things such as staying up late,
sleeping late, a little reading, cleaning out the dark and foreboding places, going through old pictures
that tell the tales of our lives and always, always - finding time on the porches.

Today is dark and sad Saturday, the day before Easter. How could our desolation or imposed isolation be worse than that original pre-Easter Saturday? That day when hope seemed very uncertain. We
know, by Grace, that tomorrow will come. The sun will rise, our hope will be realized and He will be risen! Allelujah! To my Christian friends and loved ones, I wish you a blessed Easter. Stay safe.
Stay healthy. Stay hopeful.

And if you drive by and see us on the porch, honk and wave. These days it's as good as a hug!